Methadone: A Flicker Of Light In The Dark

Methadone: A Flicker Of Light In The Dark

To provide a better understanding of the very important role methadone plays in the treatment of addiction.
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 Methadonia or Bust from UPstate NY

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Number of posts : 2
Location : syracuse, ny
Job/hobbies : reformed bad girl, student, serious cats, silly dogs, ASL, desert rat at heart
Registration date : 2010-03-22

PostSubject: Methadonia or Bust from UPstate NY   Mon Mar 22, 2010 11:25 am


I found this board today and I am so grateful I found it. I have been on methadone for about three years in Syracuse, NY. For the first two years I was comfortable going to the clinic, just happy to be free of all the chaos that heroin brought daily. As the third year anniversary is coming up, I am starting to see how flawed the system is and I am increasingly frustrated on a daily basis.

I needed to get through drug court and couldnt seem to get any clean urines. I was looking at some heavy jail time at the women's prison and was getting scared. Drug court pulled me in to the office and told me I had to get into detox or face the warrant goon squad. My DC counselor knew i was on the methadone waiting list. She put me into a rehab that would set me up with my dose after discharge. I would never have been able to complete court without methadone. I started school and I never would have been able to get through school without my dose. BUT...

I started using again after my first year of school and it has been a downward slide since then. I am frustrated and having a hard time staying clean after all this time. One part of me wants off the program and the other wants to stay on forever.

I am frustrated. just broken down. tired of the system and grateful for it. I guess i am just lost right now. but happy this forum exists.

thank you ..
miss d
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Number of posts : 863
Age : 46
Location : live in Louisiana but attend MMT clinic in Tx
Job/hobbies : COUPONING & GEOCACHING are my favorite past times but I also love reading and spending time with my husband and kids
Humor : I don't have a sense of humor.............
Registration date : 2009-05-25

PostSubject: Re: Methadonia or Bust from UPstate NY   Mon Mar 22, 2010 12:11 pm

HI. My name is RuthAnn and I am the moderator for this forum. I am also a methadone pt and have been on MMT for over 10 yrs now. I am so glad you found our forum too. You shouldn't have to be alone and there are many good people who are members of this forum and will be there for you in any way they can.

We have to support each other and that is what this forum is for.

You said you have recently starting "using" again......What is your drug of choice? Are you failing your UA's at the clinic too? Do you think you may need an increase on your meds? If you are using, having withdrawals and/or craving then there is a problem with your "treatment" plan and you need to be honest with the clinic and tell them what is going on. I know it is hard and I know that most of the time they just turn around and use what you have been honest about against you. But for you own sake and to ever reach true sobriety again you have got to find a solution to your problem.

Please know that we are here for you in any way we can. If you need someone to talk to you can post it here to the forum or contact us through the contact numbers provided below. The main thing is just know that you are not alone in this and we are here to help!

aka lilgirllost

We are not bad people trying to become good, we are sick people trying to become well.

Methadone; A Flicker Of Light In The Dark
We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
If you cannot afford to call us, send us an email and
we will call you at our expense.
Office: 1-770-334-3655~ Cell: 1-770-527-9119
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Number of posts : 71
Age : 60
Humor : PEACE
Registration date : 2010-04-29

PostSubject: Re: Methadonia or Bust from UPstate NY   Wed Jun 09, 2010 11:43 pm

Hi miss D,
I know this post is old, But I just read it. I hope everything is going ok for you??
I didnt understand if you were still using or on methadone or both.
I just know for me both doesnt work, your either in recovery or your using.
Ive been clean off of heroin for 5 years. You need to find the right dose of methadone, and
work your recovery. It will all fall into place, keep your head up, go to meetings , talk to other addicts,
It does work, all of those things together.
Much love,, Peace
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