Made to Feel Shame Being in MMT

My name is Jason and I live in London, Ont. Canada. I have been in MMT for over ten years. Like many people I was using prescription drugs not prescribed to me. I was active in my opiate addiction for just over three years. I tried to quit so many times and went to rehab twice and both times using the day I was successfully released from rehab.
In rehab I was exposed to people taking methadone and the newspaper here in London had done a big story about heroin addiction and methadone maintenance. So I had enough of living my life active in opiate addiction and I called the doctors office that was offering MMT for addicts. Dr. Martyn Judson was the doctor and he was the first doctor to offer MMT for addicts in SouthWestern Ontario Canada. I can't say enough about Dr. Judson, he is a caring, compassionate person and a great doctor.
In London just like many places world-wide the arrival of Oxycontin that was touted as a new and less addictive painkiller, opiate addiction exploded. In the last ten years in London addicts in MMT have gone from about 120 people to well over 1000 and with more people on waiting lists. London, Ont. has been in the news lately and you may have read the headlines " City Bans New Methadone Clinics For One Year" We have a clinic " Clinic 528" that is centrally located in our downtown that is filled to more than capacity and some of our city council, business and citizens have little or no tolerance for the people that need the methadone clinic. The doctors and staff
at the clinic has bent over backwards to make people understand that MMT is essential and has a positive impact on the community. People complain about the scruffy and rough looking people using the clinic and hanging around. Our police headquarters is less than half a block away from the clinic. Nobody ever talks about the reduction in crime, od's and violence that happens as a result from addicts going into MMT.
There is so much mis-information out there about methadone. Anybody with a computer can start a blog and say whatever they like about MMT without making sure the information is accurate. Many is the time I have come across a blog making claims about MMT that is entirely false and low and behold the comments have been shut off so nobody can comment on the accuracy of what is being reported. Or the comments have been shut off because the comments have become a swear fuelled attack on addicts that have no place in a normal discussion about MMT.
I'm at a point where I can no longer sit in the shadows feeling ashamed to be in MMT even though it has saved my life. I'm doing research to hopefully make an amateur documentary about MMT in London, Ont. and why it seems to be such a heated topic. Even though I feel strongly about just how effective MMT is I plan on only showing both sides just like any other media reporter. I'm hoping to get access that I might not otherwise get if I wasn't in
MMT. Anyway it's in the planning stages and I'm excited by the possibilities.

Sorry guys in my post it says "olive" headquarters. It was supposed to be "police" headquarters. I used my iPod touch to post that and I couldn't figure out how to move the text up and down while using edit.

Thanks for sharing your story Jason. You are right, it is time we stop sitting on the sidelines and hiding out. That is one of the things we hope to accomplish with our website and forum, to get ACCURATE info out there and to stand up and be counted as a successful MMT story. Good luck w/your documentary, that would be awesome to see.

I thought the majority of MMT pts in Canada have to go to the pharmacy and get dosed? Are they moving to clinics now? I see the articles about the clinics getting banned and such all the time. Could you shed some light on this for me? What determines if you go to a pharmacy or a regular clinic? Is is based on what is available in the area or if it is a government funded program or private paid? Do they even have private pay clinics in Canada since everyone there gets medical care?

Any info you will share would be great since all I really know about are the ones here in the US.

RuthAnn, Thank you for your words of encouragement. You are correct most of the cost of being in MMT in London and the rest of Ontario is covered by OHIP- Ontario Health Insurance Program. There is a nominal fee not covered by OHIP and it is for me 5 bucks a dose or day. If you have work health benefits, family assistance, welfare assistance or disibility assistance then the per dose fee is usually covered as well. Anybody that has scrambled to pay for a daily drug habit would agree that 5 bucks a day is nothing.
In London we have 4 clinics and I believe 22 pharmacies that are licensed to dispense methadone. The clinics are geared to MMT clients and the severity of their addiction and their circumstances in life. The 528 Clinic that has been getting the negative media attention is where it is for a few reasons. Many of the people that need that particular clinic are homeless and some are mentally ill. They have no way to travel great distances to other pharmacies to get their daily dose. There are doctors and pharmacists and other trained staff on site. These people get everything they need in one site centrally located close to the other social services that they may need. The Mens Mission, Salvation Army are all within walking distance of the clinic. The clinic is exactly
where it needs to be. Some of the people that need the clinic are scruffy and rough looking and it makes people uncomfortable and that's where the negative comments come from. I believe the need outweighs the personal opinions of people that refuse to try to understand the physical & mental distress the people that need the clinic are in. I believe that the citizens of London are
good people and when properly informed about the dire need of these clinics the negative comments will stop.

RuthAnn, I also strongly believe that it is up to people that have had success with MMT and have stabalized to stand up and fight for MMT. As we all know anybody that is active in their addiction can't be a spokesperson for a successful MMT, yet. It's the people whose lives have been saved by MMT that have to get involved in the fight against negative stereotypes that have no basis in anything truthful about MMT. One negaitive media report from a television tabloid like " A Current Affair" does so much damage to the public's perception about methadone that it is almost impossible to change. We need to get out there and go to the city council meetings and try to educate the public about MMT. Everytime the news runs a story about some poor person dying and they find methadone in his/her system, MMT gets slammed regardless of how or where the methadone came from. I'm just tired of it and I've made the decision to get involved.

I don't want to jinx this but I have a non-profit that wants to help produce my documentary. If I am committed to showing a fair and honest view of methadone maintenance treatment in my community that shows all sides & all issues they want to be a part of it. Thing is that's always been my goal and I believe mmt can stand on it's own if all sides of the debate is shown honestly. I will keep you guys posted.

WAY TO GO! You have to keep us updated on this, I can't wait to see it myself. I agree that it is very important to give UNBIASED, factual information. We can give them our opinions about how we support MMT and tell them our story about how much better we are, but it is the FACTS that is going to get them. That and making sure you do it in an unbiased way.

IMO MMT isn't for everyone and I don't think that every opiate addict needs methadone so while I support MMT and the use of methadone and suboxone, I also know that it isn't right for everyone. But for those that it is right for, I just want us to be able to stop being made to feel like we are defective degenerates. I have said this so many times but just like ppl use to look down their nose at ppl who suffered from depression. If you admitted to taking medication for the depression then you were REALLY crazy and were to be avoided. Once ppl realized that it is a medical condition and not a mental thing or a behavior thing, but an actual medical condition that can be treated with medication just like any other medical condition did ppl stop treating suffers like they had the plague. Now they are applauded for seeking treatment and taking the meds. WHEN ARE THEY GOING TO REALIZE THAT OPIATE ADDICTION IS A MEDICAL CONDITION AS WELL???

All right, now I am on my soap box again. I know that isn't what you were seeking by posting so I will quit now.

Thanks so much for sharing and please do keep us abreast of your project. Also, if you need some help, I don't know about anyone else, but I would be willing to help out. If you need ppl to interview or you need help gathering info or what have you, I would be willing so just let me know.

@RuthAnn, Offering different ideas & opinions is something I welcome and in my mind it's not preaching from a soapbox. You have experience & perspective when disscussing drug addiction & methadone and I value & appreciate any thoughts about drug addiction & methadone. Methadone is a volatile subject and I'm always willing to listen & disscuss it with anybody. Thank you for your offer of help and I will keep
that in mind. Dr. Martyn Judson published a study he did here in London, Ont. Canada called "Success in a Canadian Methadone Maintenance Treatment Program" published June 2010. I had done search for it on this site but couldn't find it. It's possible I made an error searching. For me it was a bit of heavy reading but my understanding is that it is unique in that 9 of 10 opiate addicts in the study were addicted to oxy & not heroin. That's how Dr.Judson explained it to me. Anyway I thought you may like to read it if you haven't already. For sure I will keep you updated with the documentary & I will keep your offer of help in mind.
Thanks
Jason

Jason I think thats cool your doin that documentry, we need one out there, with pros and cons.
But ya know what the Biggest pro is its SAVING peoples lives.
I cant wait to see it.

Thanks for the kind words. It's kinda ironic that saving lives was mentioned. I spoke to a woman last night about the documentary. Her son Chad was living in the same city I live in. He injures himself and goes to the doctor and is given oxy. Life goes on and one day Chad realised he was addicted to oxy. He goes to the same doctor and explains the situation and asks for help. The doctor was not understanding or kind to Chad at all. The doctor gives him another prescription of oxy but at a much lower daily dose. Up to that point the amount of oxy had been increasing and I believe it was 500 mg (it should be noted that I have no direct knowlege on the exact amount he was prescribed daily) Chad ended up on top of a parking garage & jumped to his death. Many people may have read about Chad and I believe his mom created a website to educate people about the dangers of oxy. I can't help but wonder what would have happend with Chad if he had found methadone when he was asking for help.

Chad is the perfect example of docs overprescribing and then when someone comes to them after finally getting the guts to face up to the fact that they have a problem of turning their back on them! I understand the doc may feel some mixed feelings thinking that he prescribed the drugs that got the person addicted in the first place, but I would think if it was that on my concious or the death of the person because I wouldn't help them.........well that is a no brainer to me.

I agree, I wonder how different things may have turned out had he been introduced to methadone......